My one year anniversay is in 14 days. That's all I was thinking for the past two months, marking the days and doing a countdown when in reality I was supposed to be thinking about what to do after that one year mark and I was probably supposed to talk to my boyfriend too.
When you decide to take the risk on a long distance relationship, no matter how short that distance is, you need to have a few things in mind, and to me that was the easy part, the hard part of all this came after a couple of months away from my boyfriend, and even if we're only four hours away, it feels like an entire universe. You need to know that I was not sure about wanting a relationship like this, and, certainly, my boyfriend was not a very big fan of the idea and somehow he agreed.
On this seven months away, I've learnt a lot of things, but is hasn't got any easier.There are things that never change and things that need work but trust me on this one, a long distance relationship is just as hard as a normal one. So, here they are, a few of those many things I've learnt.
1. If he used to ignore his phone while you were together, he will do it when you're apart.
I don't mean never taking your calls, but maybe send a couple of them to voicemail because he is with his best girl friend, or a bunch of college friends at this bar, he will do exactly as he wants, and you will do too. You can ignore him, get mad at him, cry, and he doesn't even have to know. It can save a lot of drama but it can also create a lot more, specially if he hangs out a lot with one particular person and decides to ignore your crazy important "what are you doing text"
2. Skype, social media, and your phone are, from the start and until you are reunited, your most dear possesions.
You can't see him, you can't hug him but you can speak a hell of a lot to him, skype is a miracle made in heaven, if your boyfriend doesn't get tired of technology, and your phone is your main communication with your partner. Embrace them, learn to love them, and don't get tired of texting and calling, ever.
3. As much as you try, you have a life apart from him, and he does too.
He can't follow on everything that's going on 500 miles away from him and you can't either, you'll tell the most important things, you'll talk but every little detail is hard to remember. He might even forget your anniversary or your birthday, but it's not on purpose. Also, you can't both be sitting all day talking on skype, so yes you both will go out with other people, just don't ignore your phone.
4. Traveling is hard.
"we will see each other every weekend and we'll take turns, and it'll be as if we were never apart" is not happening, traveling costs money, time and effort, you might have all of those but what about college, work and all those things? finding a weekend that suits both is not as easy as it seems.
5. Everyone will tell you it's better to breakup.
I don't tell you what to do, so just leave me alone.
6. You both, will have a meltdown at one point and starts consider to breakup.
This feeling will pass if you talk to each other and consider all the worthy things that the other person has. Don't let it grow, don't feed it, talk about it with your significant other and it will go away.
7. I will never get easier.
You'll never stop missing him, loving him or thinking about him, The distance won't get any shorter and the time apart will only disappear if one of you moves to the place where the other lives. But the time that you get to spend with your love one, will be the best ever.
8. It is all worth it.
The long nights with no sleep, the waiting, the missing and all those large phone bills are worth the effort. If you can survive a long distance relationships, then there is nothing you two can't do.
Either you decide that a long distance relationship is for you or not, never forget that when loves goes away you need to keep the door open to let him back in.
